Socializing is Not Always Good — Lists to Remember While Trying to Make a Social Connection

How was your social life?

Do you have an expectation about your relationship to other people outside around you? I think all people around the world have it. Because we know that we need other people to keep alive even though some people may experiencing something bad about it. May be because the energy of environment around us not really matched to what we have or some other just want the life that they live in peace and they think people just make a mess in their life or some other have a traumatic moment relating to other.

I just want a bit share about what my experience in this 24th years old. May be in this age is the moment where I change my behavior around people because some lessons that I have learnt. I struggle a lot about making a good connection to people around me because there so many things caused by past experience shaping my mind. 

Sometimes we are not be able to choose where we live, where we work, what type of people that we face, what country etc. due to some conditions and we can't deny to face them.

For me immerse my self in social  may help to reduce my loneliness and boost my oxytocin level when I met proper people to talk or to spend the time together with them.

 Loneliness kills. It’s as powerful as smoking or alcoholism.

Robert Waldinger, now the 4th director of the study, said in a TED Talk, 

So we just need to build connection with them even socializing also take my anxious into high level radically when I feel there is something wrong about the connection whether is it untrust feeling, aware about they making something unproper to me like underestimating, body-shaming, unappreciation, trying to enter the private life, bullying, and many things and I knew in my society they are so really usual about it and they can easily adapt but not me with different values.

I really want to share the lists to remember while trying to make social connection:

1. Not all people are good
2. Not all what we think right is real
3. Good people are not labeled by religion that they believe
4. Their smile is not actually a good smile
5. Their support is not actually support
6. Your stories is not worth to share
7. How 5 steps forward saves you
8. The gentle words are not gentle

You can imagine and visualize the list and match them with your experience.